wow, it's been quite a while since i last posted. just was thinking today about how i haven't been keeping a journal or updating this page in a long time and how it's funny to read about what was going on in my life waaaay back when and thinking, wow, i was so immature then. not that i'm so much better now, hehe.

so the one rant i have (today?) is that i hate people who use 'like' every other sentence. or word. pretty common pet peeve, but worse if you're living in cali, no? just like some people say that having a southern accent makes you sound stupid (i personally think it's endearing), being unable to think through and say an entire sentence without using 'like' or 'um' makes me kinda disgusted. c'mon now.

another thing that i was thinking a lot about today was trying to figure out where i belong in the spectrum of this religion thing. way back in another life i was a southern baptist who thought god-fearing church-going people were righteous and the right kind of people to be (and that there was nothing else), until i became really skeptical after thinking through how the church is run (think business) and how many church leaders (choose whatever congregation/denomination you want) cannot think critically. i was first blown away when there was so much condemnation of evolution and how the pulpit couldn't figure out that perhaps evolution and the big bang does fit in with the christian view of the beginnings of the world. of course there are exceptions to the rule, but the scandals of late have really tarnished my view of the church as a 'good' institution and a necessary part of people's lives. then there's the issue of sunday christians (you know who you are)...my belief is that if i ere to really become a christian, i would have to really make an effort to make it part of my life and become a truly better person. no, there is no 'washing away of my sins' in that i would be able to go out and do all the sins that i want because i know it'll all be forgiven on sunday, the one day i sway dramatically and raise my hands when singing the gospel, and the one day that i crack open my bible. that's just not right. here's a dorky analogy for you. last week i went to visit the transplant diabetes clinic last week, and they were telling me that, yes, type 1 diabetes patients can eat allll the carbs and sugar they want as long as they pump themselves up with enough insulin. but they all end up ballooning, esp if they don't exercise. i see a parallel between these patients who abuse insulin and the christians who use God and Christ as excuses for being able to do whatever they want (and being able to wipe their consciences clean on Sundays). sigh. true, they're not ALL like that, but if the shoe fits...

that's all for tonite. gotta get back to work again, homework still waiting patiently for me to finish typing. almost 1 am now. i'm going to be graduating from my coterm program in june, very much looking forward to that though i am worried about finding a job currently. wish me luck :)